Humor Section!

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[GTP]

 

[GTP]

WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?

Tony Abbott (Former Australian Prime Minister)

My Government has a policy in place and will implement
that policy to stop illegal chickens from entering Australia,
weather they cross the road or not.

Bill Shorten (Member of Parliament)

This is a blatant attempt to dupe the Australian public into
believing that locking chickens up in detention centres will
stop chickens crossing the road!
We have an inept Prime Minister and an inept Labour Government
with an inherently flawed policy which denies the rights of
Chickens to cross the road!

PETER COSTELLO (Former Treasurer who introduced GST)

A GST levy will be applied to the chicken if applicable criteria
are met. Is the chicken cooked or raw? Whole or in pieces?
Anyone who tries to avoid paying GST in regard to
this chicken crossing rule will be dealt with severely by the Tax Office!

GRANDPA

In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the
road. Someone told us that the chicken crossed the road,
and that was good enough for us.

HOMER SIMPSON

Mmmmm! Chicken!

PAT BUCHANAN

To steal a job from a decent, hardworking American.

JERRY FALWELL

Because the chicken was gay! Isn't it obvious? Can't you
people see the plain truth in front of your face?
The chicken was going to the "other side."
That's what "they" call it- the "other side."
Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay. And, if you eat
that chicken, you will become gay too!
I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out
this abomination that the liberal media whitewashes with
seemingly harmless phrase like "the other side." That
chicken should not be free to cross the road!
It's as plain and simple as that!

DR. SEUSS

Did the chicken cross the road?
Did he cross it with a toad?
Yes! The chicken crossed the road,
but why it crossed, I've not been told!

ERNEST HEMINGWAY

To die. In the rain. Alone and afraid.

MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.

I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross
roads without having their motives called into question.

ARISTOTLE

It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

KARL MARX

It was a historical inevitability.

SADDAM HUSSEIN

This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite
justified in dropping 350 tons of nerve gas and seventy scud
missiles on the infidel.

RONALD REAGAN

What chicken?

CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRK

To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.

DR SPOCK

It's a chicken Jim, but not as we know it.
It has evolved from crossing roads to crossing universes
in an endless quest for peace.

FOX MULDER

You saw it cross the road with your own eyes. How many
more chickens have to cross before you believe it?

DANA SCULLY

Mulder! Chickens dont cross roads without reason!
I'll do an autopsy to find out why this particular chicken
decided to cross the road!

SIGMUND FREUD

The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken
crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.

BILL GATES

I have just released eChicken 11, which will not only
cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important
documents, and balance your chequebook.
Microsoft Drumstick is an inextricable part of eChicken 11.
I have automatically deducted $759.95 from your
cheque account for the upgrade from eChicken 10.
Do not make illegal copies of eChicken 11!
Thank you.

EINSTEIN

Did the chicken really cross the road? Or did the road move
beneath the chicken?

BILL CLINTON

I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What do you
mean by chicken? Could you define "chicken" please?"

GEORGE W. BUSH

I don't think I should have to answer that question.


LOUIS FARRAKHAN

The road, you will see, represents the black man. The
chicken crossed the "black man" in order to trample him
and keep him down.

THE BIBLE

And lo, God decended from the heavens. And He said unto
the chicken, "Thou shalt cross the road." And the chicken
crossed the road and entered into the land of Canan.
And God saw that it was good.
And the Philistines were smited.
And there was great rejoicing. Amen!

COLONEL SANDERS

Did I miss one?

 

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[britechguy]

But he, clearly, is not!

 

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