Humor Section!

[Metanis]

Can someone explain this one please? I'm at a total loss to understand any part of it.

Compare the two headlines about AI. Comical exposition of click-bait!

 

[ThatPlace928]

 

[Porthos]

 

[Porthos]

 

[Porthos]

 

[Porthos]

 

[britechguy]

Interior punctuation in hashtags is more critical at certain times than at others!

 

[frase]

When you think your day is bad read this..

This is even funnier when you realize it's real! Next time you have a bad day at work think of this guy.
Bob is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in Louisiana. He performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs.
Below is an E-mail he sent to his sister. She then sent it to radio station 103.5 on FM dial in Indiana, who was sponsoring a worst job experience contest.

Needless to say, she won. Read his letter below:

Hi Sue,

Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother. Last week I had a bad day at the office. I know you've been feeling down lately at work, so I thought I would share my dilemma with you to make you realize it's not so bad after all. Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first must bore you with a few technicalities of my job. As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea. I wear a suit to the office. It's a wet suit. This time of year the water is quite cool. So what we do to keep warm is this: We have a diesel powered industrial water heater. This $20,000 piece of equipment sucks the water out of the sea. It heats it to a delightful temperature. It then pumps it down to the diver through a garden hose, which is taped to the air hose.

Now this sounds like a darn good plan, and I've used it several times with no complaints. What I do, when I get to the bottom and start working, is take the hose and stuff it down the back of my wet suit. This floods my whole suit with warm water. It's like working in a Jacuzzi. Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my butt started to itch. So, of course, I scratched it.

This only made things worse. Within a few seconds my ass started to burn. I pulled the hose out from my back, but the damage was done. In agony I realized what had happened. The hot water machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my suit. Now, since I don't have any hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn't stick to it, however, the crack of my ass was not as fortunate. When I scratched what I thought was an itch, I was actually grinding the jellyfish into the crack of my ass.



I informed the dive supervisor of my dilemma over the communicator. His instructions were unclear due to the fact that he, along with five other divers, were all laughing hysterically. Needless to say, I aborted the dive.

I was instructed to make three agonizing in-water decompression stops totaling thirty-five minutes before I could reach the surface to begin my chamber dry decompression. When I arrived at the surface, I was wearing nothing but my brass helmet. As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of laughter running down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub it on my butt as soon as I got in the chamber. The cream put the fire out, but I couldn't take a crap for two days because my ass was swollen shut.

So, next time you're having a bad day at work, think about how much worse it would be

If you had a jellyfish shoved up your ass. Now repeat to yourself, 'I love my job, I love my job, I love my job.' Whenever you have a bad day, ask yourself, is this a jellyfish bad day?

Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift.

 

[ThatPlace928]

 

[Porthos]

 

[Porthos]

 

[britechguy]

And anyone who hasn't noticed that Windows intentionally (and, yes, I do mean intentionally) lags if an update that needs a restart to complete and has been ignored "for too long" then they have not been paying attention.

When I've not been paying attention at times when I notice Windows is suddenly lagging, badly, almost invariably it's because a restart is needed to apply an update that was installed, but has been waiting, for quite a while since.

These days, the restart time is generally under 5 minutes and the estimates given are usually longer than the actual time required.

 

[HCHTech]

These days, the restart time is generally under 5 minutes and the estimates given are usually longer than the actual time required.

That depends on the machine and the update of course - but it never seems to come at a good time. I just need to reboot to get on with whatever job I'm doing, when inevitably there is a 5 or 10 minutes delay and I get to watch the "You're 30% there" ticker. It's maddening.

For our RMM customers we added a popup nag dialog whenever there is an update waiting on a reboot. You can delay to a specific time, but you can't choose to not reboot. They don't love us for it, but it keeps the machines in better shape, that's for sure.

 

[britechguy]

I just need to reboot to get on with whatever job I'm doing, when inevitably there is a 5 or 10 minutes delay and I get to watch the "You're 30% there" ticker. It's maddening.

I just make a point of rebooting, now, if that's convenient or at "close of business" or before retiring for the night if it's not. I try to keep an eye on my system tray for the icon that tells you that a reboot is waiting to complete and update.

It's just part and parcel of keeping any OS up to date, though it can be inconveniently timed, that's for sure. But I don't tend to develop lag unless I put this off for at least 24 hours or more. But when the lag kicks in, it's definitely annoying enough that I will gladly take the 5 minute interruption to get rid of it. I consider that my penance for having sinned against Windows! ;-)

 

[frase]

 

[ThatPlace928]

 

[ThatPlace928]

 

[Porthos]

 

[Porthos]

 

[Porthos]