Humor Section!

[frase]

lol @4, every time.

 

[Porthos]

 

[Porthos]

 

[ThatPlace928]

 

[ThatPlace928]

 

[britechguy]

View attachment 14865

I've got cousins I'm very close to living in Chandler. I cannot imagine how you all in AZ are getting through this latest heat bomb. I know that these triple digit temperatures do happen, usually multiple times per summer, but they seem to be hanging around for many more days on end this time that I recall being "within normal limits."

 

[ThatPlace928]

I've got cousins I'm very close to living in Chandler. I cannot imagine how you all in AZ are getting through this latest heat bomb. I know that these triple digit temperatures do happen, usually multiple times per summer, but they seem to be hanging around for many more days on end this time that I recall being "within normal limits."

It's not that difficult. I love the heat and I live on the river, maybe 1000 feet walking distance. I only worry about my plants staying alive and my cats during a power failure. We had a bad one last Summer, when a microburst took out a dozen poles near my shop. Road was blocked to my shop so I couldn't get in to get the cat kennels. I sat in the door with the screen open for about 8 hours or more so the cats had at least a breeze but couldn't escape. I wanted to put them in their kennels, then move them to the shade outside. But without access to them, we all stayed put. I was afraid I'd lose one. Once it cooled down, I went down to the river and pretty much threw myself in.

It's been around 116-117 degrees for the past week. Yesterday was 118 but temps of over 120 were being reported throughout Bullhead and Laughlin. Summer came on with a vengeance this year.

 

[Kitten Kong]

I changed my iPod's name to Titanic. It's syncing now.

England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool.

Haunted French pancakes give me the crepes.

This girl today said she recognized me from the Vegetarians Club, but I'd swear I've never met herbivore.

I know a guy who's addicted to drinking brake fluid, but he says he can stop any time.

A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.

When the smog lifts in Los Angeles U.C.L.A.

I got some batteries that were given out free of charge.

A dentist and a manicurist married. They fought tooth and nail.

A will is a dead giveaway.

With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress.

Police were summoned to a daycare center where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.

Did you hear about the fellow whose entire left side was cut off? He's all right now.

A bicycle can't stand alone; it's just two tired.

The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine last week is now fully recovered.

He had a photographic memory but it was never fully developed.

When she saw her first strands of gray hair she thought she'd dye.

Acupuncture is a jab well done. That's the point of it.

I didn't like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.

Did you hear about the crossed-eyed teacher who lost her job because she couldn't control her pupils?

When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble.

When chemists die, they barium.

I stayed up all night to see where the sun went, and then it dawned on me.

I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. I just can't put it down.

Those who get too big for their pants will be totally exposed in the end.

 

[Metanis]

I changed my iPod's name to Titanic. It's syncing now.

I'm going to remember that one for the next time I get a device sync service call!

 

[ThatPlace928]

 

[timeshifter]

I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. I just can't put it down.

I bought a really good self help book called How to End Procrastination. I haven't read it yet.

 

[ThatPlace928]

 

[ThatPlace928]

 

[Porthos]

 

[Porthos]

 

[frase]

 

[ThatPlace928]

 

[frase]

My email flights at least once a week from Outlook Airways..

 

[Porthos]

 

[Porthos]