Humor Section!

[Larry Sabo]

Thank you for shopping at Costco!

LOL! Hilarious!

 

[NETWizz]

Found this http://www.lettersofnote.com/2011/02/regarding-your-stupid-complaint.html

 

[Markverhyden]

Onsite doing a cut over, killing time. Had to bite my tongue to keep from laughing out loud.

 

[Mr. Ingram's Computer Repair & Shoppe]

 

[GTP]

 

[Mr. Ingram's Computer Repair & Shoppe]

Spoiler: Big boy (or girl) language

Since I got yelled at for putting "inappropriate language" meme last time...

"We own you. Learn more."

 

[NETWizz]

View attachment 9248

Isn't it true that just about everything in Australia is venomous? Like 9 out of 10 snakes and 4 out of 5 spiders???

 

[GTP]

Isn't it true that just about everything in Australia is venomous? Like 9 out of 10 snakes and 4 out of 5 spiders???

Well, not quite everything is venemous.
Of the 520 species of lizards none are venomous but you could get an infection from a bite from a Goanna or Perenti or lose your life to a crocodile.
Out of ~170 species of snakes (including sea snakes) 100 are venomous, about 12 being extremely venomous. Some like the Eastern Tiger snake, Taipan, Eastern Brown Snake, Copperhead, Death Adder, and Yellow-Bellied sea snake are so venomous you could die from a bite in 1~2 hours if no treatment was administered.

Out of 2400 species of spider, less than 50 are harmful to humans...
There's probably only 5~6 that you should worry about as the others will just cause a painful bite.
The most dangerous and deadly is the Funnel Web, (the male is much smaller than the female but is much more deadly) followed by the Redback spider, Mouse Spiders and White tailed Spiders.

Other extremely deadly creatures include, Stonefish, Lion Fish, BlueBottles, Sea Wasps, Textile Cone, Blue Ringed Octopus, Box jellyfish, Saltwater Crocs, Fresh Water Crocs and many species of sharks (Grey Nurse, White Pointer, Tiger Shark, Hammerhead, Black Tipped Reef Shark, Blue Shark, Bronze Whaler, Bull Shark, etc) that would think nothing of having you for lunch!

But possibly the most dangerous animal in Aus would have to be this guy!

 

[GTP]

Bluey goes to an outdoor show and wins a tinnie.

He brings it home and his misses looks at him and says,

"What you gonna do with that. There’s no water deep enough to float a boat within 160 Km's of here."

He says, "I won it and I'm gonna bloody keep it."

His mate comes over to visit several days later.

He sees Bluey's misses and asks where Bluey is.

She says, "He's out there in his tinnie", pointing to the paddock behind the house.

Old Mate heads out behind the house and sees Bluey in the middle of a paddock sittin' in the tinnie with a fishin' rod in his hand ..

He yells out to him, "What the bloody hell are you doin'?"

Bluey replies, "I'm fishin'. What the f**k does it look like I'm a doin?"

Old Mate yells, "It's people like you that give people from Queensland a bad name, makin' everybody think we're bloody stupid!

Bluey yells, If I could bloody swim, I'd come over there and kick your bloody 'arse mate!"

 

[GTP]

 

[GTP]

 

[NETWizz]

Well, not quite everything is venemous.
Of the 520 species of lizards none are venomous but you could get an infection from a bite from a Goanna or Perenti or lose your life to a crocodile.
Out of ~170 species of snakes (including sea snakes) 100 are venomous, about 12 being extremely venomous. Some like the Eastern Tiger snake, Taipan, Eastern Brown Snake, Copperhead, Death Adder, and Yellow-Bellied sea snake are so venomous you could die from a bite in 1~2 hours if no treatment was administered.

Out of 2400 species of spider, less than 50 are harmful to humans...
There's probably only 5~6 that you should worry about as the others will just cause a painful bite.
The most dangerous and deadly is the Funnel Web, (the male is much smaller than the female but is much more deadly) followed by the Redback spider, Mouse Spiders and White tailed Spiders.

Other extremely deadly creatures include, Stonefish, Lion Fish, BlueBottles, Sea Wasps, Textile Cone, Blue Ringed Octopus, Box jellyfish, Saltwater Crocs, Fresh Water Crocs and many species of sharks (Grey Nurse, White Pointer, Tiger Shark, Hammerhead, Black Tipped Reef Shark, Blue Shark, Bronze Whaler, Bull Shark, etc) that would think nothing of having you for lunch!

But possibly the most dangerous animal in Aus would have to be this guy!

View attachment 9249

Not the Kola... it's too cute and cuddly to be dangerous to humans????

 

[GTP]

Not the Kola

Koala...FTFY.

Koala's are fairly "laid back" but should never be taken for granted. They can mess you up if you aren't careful. They can bite and scratch.
Oh and the males are very strong!

 

[coffee]

If anyone really cared about taking care of the Earth then we would build a giant hoover vacuum...

 

[frase]

 

[NETWizz]

 

[GTP]

 

[GTP]

 

[GTP]

I for one did not laugh, tho it was probably funny back in the'80s or obviously in Aus today. Female techs are a scarce commodity in the professional IT world so can you please try not be "funny" at their expense.

Lighten up dude. It's just a bit of over the top sexist banter for a laugh.
It's got nothing to do with "female techs."
It's just a bit of fun. Sheesh!

 

[GTP]

Happy now?